THIRTIETH BIRTHDAY | CC Hart
She arrives dressed like it’s Friday night
lips vermillion and hair combed slick, fringed
purse swinging to the clack of booted footfalls
She's late; I have waited, seated near Nuclear Medicine
three-shot espresso and sweatsuit, frayed
novel lying flat on my lap, a slapdash pick
A rushed hello and a hug
I only got home an hour ago!
I was so frantic I grabbed the wrong book!
and we’re ushered through doors abloom with warnings
biohazard roses and radiation orchids
a decal bouquet for Anna
PET scan as present
In the changing room she is rankled
—midnight martinis and not enough sleep—
so I read random pages from Fifty Shades of Grey
a fan-fiction oratory as Anna disrobes
I begin in a whisper but I’m jittery
—way too caffeinated and underfed—
so I exaggerate the moans, emphasize every sigh,
embellish the dialogue with breathy gasps and groans
I thought we were alone
The giggles begin not with my friend
but behind a different curtain
where someone doffs her hospital gown
and stifles bursts of laughter
Anna laughs too
a prankster’s cackle at the absurd:
lurid novel as respite from the gallium oracle
Then, she regales me and our dressing room colluder
with morsels from last night’s hook-up;
she kept her bra on and never mentioned the tumors
A pensive goodbye from our conspirator
You have a lust for life!
I have a lust for lust!
and the phlebotomist escorts Anna to the lab
where the catheter delivers its gift
a radiopharmaceutical cocktail
glucose and tracer for the birthday girl
I return to the waiting room where I read in silence
stalking words in the tawdry paperback
words to repurpose when we get the news
CC Hart is a neurodiversity advocate, artist and author. She is a founding board member of the International Association of Synaesthetes, Artists and Scientists (IASAS), where she serves as secretary. Her artworks have been exhibited in Spain, Russia, Belgium and the USA. Her poetry and essays have been published internationally, both in print and electronically. Ms. Hart continues to learn how her divergent brain creates both opportunities and obstacles, and she supports the argument that neurodiverse traits represent part of the spectrum of human somatosensory, intellectual and cognitive experience. She holds a Master of Fine Arts from the University of San Francisco. Currently, she is a student in the Narrative Medicine program at Columbia University in New York City.