Will Moody graduated from the University of Denver in June 2020. He is currently applying to medical school, writing, and spending time with his family while he continues treatment. His piece “Against the Glass” appears in the Fall 2021 Intima.
For every young adult diagnosed with cancer, a time comes when we ask ourselves a question.
Why?
Why did this happen to me? Why now? They are not questions we want an answer to, but as humans, we crave finding meaning in our lives. We do it because the alternative is accepting that cosmic randomness determines our very breath.
In Julia Sevy’s heartrending piece, “Constellations” (Spring 2015 Intima), Sevy experiences a paradox that young adults with cancer and their loved ones often encounter. We desperately want a reason something so horrible is happening to us, but we are terrified of receiving an answer. So, we take the one course of action that gives us a modicum of control. We live in the moment. We do not pretend to be blissfully ignorant of the situation, but instead, we remain humbled by the enormity of the task and the new universe arriving on our doorsteps.
In turn, we learn that, random or not, intended or otherwise, our reality is now. Today is an ever-present opportunity to become a version of ourselves we would never have otherwise unlocked. Instead of being paralyzed by the fear of the unknown, each new day becomes an opportunity to feel deeper, live louder and touch the lives of those around us.
In my piece, “Against the Glass” (Fall 2021 Intima), I learned this power from a friend before she passed away from a rare form of cancer. As a result, I came to understand that in the end, all we have is hope. Sevy too holds on to this innately human belief in confronting the sometimes inexorable march of cancer in a young person’s body. In my experience battling cancer as a 22-year-old, it was often daunting to assess the reality of my situation. However, living life one day at a time made it possible to make enormous challenges small.
Cancer in young adults offers a haunting juxtaposition of budding life and death. Yet, cancer has taught me that fate and chance often appear to be identical. Instead of worrying about who is writing our story, we must live our lives through the values and intentions we hold, creating our own meaning within the randomness.
Will Moody graduated from the University of Denver in June 2020. In May 2020, Moody was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. After undergoing initially successful treatment, he was informed that his cancer had returned in November 2020. Moody is currently applying to medical school, writing, and spending time with his family while he continues treatment. His work also appears in Pulse, Aspiring Docs Diaries, The Appendix, and his blog, The Rest of Your Life.